Nothing saddens you more than the moments when the child rejects your kisses, hugs and all the evidence of affection you want to offer. The mood of the preschool child fluctuates constantly. Before you think that he doesn't love you or hate you, here are some of the most common reasons why preschoolers suddenly switch from one state to another, but also the most appropriate ways to respond to such behavior!
The thought that your little one loves you does not tear your soul and gives you a state of unease and sadness as you have never felt before. Instead of being sad when you see the little one ignoring you, refusing to be hugged or kissed or doesn't want to talk to you anymore, it's important to find out the causes of this behavior. These will help you to better understand his behavior, which, most of the times, is part of the natural development from his age.
The baby is not too "sticky" from the yarn
Always look for the right ways to show your affection for the child! Always keep in mind the nature or temperament you have, to avoid unpleasant situations where you refuse your gadgets, puppets and other evidence of affection.
You cannot be sticky all the time with him if he is not an affectionate and extroverted person. He will not accept these forms of manifestation of love for him, because there are situations in which he does not feel comfortable.
If the little extroverts are no longer saturated with hugs, kisses and declarations of love from their parents, the introverted and more withdrawn from the threads enjoy manifesting these feelings in slightly subtler ways: preparing the favorite dessert, a greeting written with love, an email or sms.
It goes through the rebirth or independence phase
All preschoolers go through a "rebirth" phase against everyone, but especially their parents. It appears around the age of 3 or 4 years, when it tries to impose its own opinions and to be autonomous in most of the actions that they undertake.
As the child grows and develops more skills, he or she will begin to have less and less need for you in dressing, eating, washing and other activities for which, until now, it depended on your help.
Many parents are overwhelmed by this attitude of the child. They have the impression that they are rejected because they are not loved. In reality, the child just wants to be on his own in many things he does. For this reason, they may remove you every time you try to reach or help them.
It is important not to take these reactions personally and to know how to identify the moments when you can be affectionate with him, in order not to receive a refusal that saddens you. For example, do not try to show them evidence of love when playing or looking at drawings. Seek to do these things when he is attentive to you and not busy with anything else, that is, when you spend time together.
He is upset with you and this is how he looks
Indifference and denial of the evidence of affection is also a means of communication for the preschooler. Because he does not have a very well developed language and cannot express his annoyances and frustrations verbally, he uses various behaviors to convey his emotions and messages. One of them is the one who ignores you and refuses any attempt to interact with him, including the hugs and hugs that are generally so dear to him.
The child may be upset because you refused him something or interrupted him from a pleasant activity for him. Remember that when he is small, he has a very low tolerance for frustration and does not sit well with the patience chapter. He cannot tolerate the fact that he does not do all his cravings and does not have the patience to wait until you have enough money to take his favorite toy. For this reason, it "rewards" you with a large dose of indifference, the only weapon available to you and that knows how to bear fruit to upset you.
The child is simply having a bad day
Just because it is small, does not mean that it can not be bored, irritated or deprived of the boss and the desire to venture into games or other types of activities. And your baby can have a bad day, just like any other person. He may have moments when he is silent or withdrawn, without implying that there is something wrong with him.
If you have a good health, you know that you have not "upset" him with anything and yet he does not want to talk to anyone, then respect his need for privacy and keep some distance. Let him stay away for a while and recover on his own. Only if the condition is prolonged for several hours or days, try to find a favorable moment to talk to him and find out if there is another cause for this poor disposition.
Rejects only one parent
There is a period in the preschool stage where the child can be very attached to one parent, while the other almost ignores it. Whether you are the one who is "put to the wall" and deprived of the child's attention and love or is the father, it is important to realize that this phase is natural in its development.
She is often encouraged by certain factors: the parent she adores is more permissive with him, she does all the lusts, spends more time with him, etc. It is important that both you and your father agree on the disciplinary style you adopt in your child's education.
It is advisable to apply the same rules and penalties. If one is firm in establishing and imposing rules and limits on his behavior, and the other allows him to do what he wants, in secret, the child is encouraged to favor the parent less strictly, which can be harmful in his later development.
Do you know of any other causes for which the child can reject the parents' evidence of love? Tell us your opinions in the comments section below!
Tags Evidence of affection for children Communication of children Behavior of children Affection of children