I don't often think about how I would like my child's future to be, but, like any parent, I sometimes ask myself questions. How do I know I'm doing the right thing? What could I change to be better? What do I expect to happen over many years?
I want to have a good relationship with him, to treat him as a family member, not as a subordinate. I want to be friends and not invade his life.
In order to answer my questions, I need to know how I would like him to be in the future.
How would I like to be my adult son and who would I want to be in my relationship with him?
I would like to be independent, brave and trust in him. Call me and tell me: "Mom, you know that tomorrow I will go to place X to do the Y. It is very important for me. I want to keep my fists because I am going to do a good job. you support in any project ".
I wouldn't want to ask myself if it would work or what to do. I wouldn't want to make decisions for him, to change his life. I wish they had the courage to try everything until they find their way.
It's probably risky to walk permanently on unsafe ground. Probably if he asked my advice, the tendency would be to turn his attention to stability, not to take much risk, not to worry too much. But to be serious, that's not what he needs.
I would like to know how to give advice only when asked.
I would like that when his head hurts I do not recommend pill, but to tell him that I am sorry. You probably already know that there are drugs for this.
I would like to choose his way in life without thinking about what I or someone else would say. To know that I am happy for every thing I do well and if it fails, it will be another learning opportunity.
He knows that if he needs help he can find me.
To seek a wife for his taste, not mine.
To climb the highest mountain because that is what he wants, and I will not tell him that it is too high or that I do not see the point.
Don't call me every day just to not be upset.
Don't tell me "kiss your hand" unless he feels this.
To see his happiness on his face. You know it's fulfilled.
To know how to lose even if it was important. Every failure is a step forward.
To do what he likes. His job to be what he wanted, to go to work for pleasure.
To dream. Not to ceiling, but to always want more from life.
To know about him as he can, that he has all the qualities to achieve what he wants.
To be honest, good and polite.
To visit me because he misses me, not because it is so.
There would probably be plenty more to say, but if at least some of these are achieved, it means I've done my job well.
I do not demand respect or gratitude. But I will receive them if I choose to be a balanced parent.
Children are like flowers
When we plant a flower we don't know what it will be like in the end. We only know that we want to be vigorous, beautiful, to delight our eyes. We do not know if the soil is most suitable, if the seeds are very healthy or if we watered it exactly as needed. Only when it blooms do we realize if our mode of action was the right one.
So are the children. Flowers that do not need beautiful pots, but fertile soil. Let's take care of them!
I am Luiza and I have two flowers. I write more about us on the blog Emotiidemamica.ro, but you can find us on Facebook Emotiidemamica.ro.
I hope to enjoy my flowers.
Tags Relationship mother boy Grow boy